Preachers or Pushers?

A friend of mine challenged a group of church creatives with a deceptively simple question: how do you experience God in a fresh way?. He reminded us of a Hillsong release called Fresh Wind. The chorus claims we need a fresh wind, a fresh experience of God offered by His Spirit. The song's a beautiful meditation on our continual need for a touch from God, like a dopamine hit. 

Don't get me wrong. I like the song. My reference to dopamine isn't a cynical commentary on the song or its message. As my friend challenged us to share with one another how and where we find a fresh, invigorating encounter with God, he was vulnerable and shared part of his own story. He spoke of the grind that a megachurch can be, where creative team staffers stumble from Sunday to Sunday. The incessant rhythm of production never quite affords them the opportunity for a fresh touch of God's Spirit. My friend was challenging us to find a place for that fresh touch of God. He then asked where we encountered Him. Different people on this creative team shared their experiences...while driving...in nature..., etc. 

No one mentioned church. 

He then said something remarkable, "You can't fix the grind with more church." I checked out of the conversation a bit at that point. My mind was racing. Even before a global pandemic accelerated the re-imagining of the wealthy and western model of church, high-profile deconstructions like that of Michael Gungor unearthed a shaky foundation. As I checked back into the conversation, I heard from my own lips a critical assessment of consumerism among church people. My comments revealed a deeper unease about our current model than I'd realized was roiling inside me.

The one place a faith community should be able to seek God together seemed oddly lacking in the lives of these incredible people—people I love—who worked long hours for less than they might earn at a for-profit job. They chose this life, in most cases because they sensed God wanted them to serve in full-time vocational ministry. Yet, when asked an open-ended question about how their spiritual hunger is satisfied, none of them said, "I encounter God most powerfully with my community in a church service."

Don't you find that odd? 

Admittedly, the way the question was framed may have conditioned their answers. Even so, it's strange that no one mentions a church. Their responses beg the question, "What are we doing, then?" If the very people who are most responsible for creating a service experience where others might encounter God don't even mention church as a possibility when asked where they meet God, what are we to think? 

I was there. I didn't mention church. Then it dawned on me. Am I growing cynical about my own confidence in the church gathered? I had to ask myself: "Are we preachers or are we pushers?" The distinction wasn't immediately apparent to me. My next thought was, "I need to repent."

It's not that I dislike church, my church, any church really. I still can get kind of tingly when I hear the first bars of a favorite worship song. I still feel challenged by the allure of a particularly powerful rhetorical flourish from a skilled preacher. However, here's the thing. I can feel the exact same feelings outside of the context of anything sacred. I feel the feels when Bohemian Rhapsody begins to play in my feed. I love the rhetoric of a skilled author, like that which flows from the pen of Richard Powers in Overstory.

And the real problem is this. Have I settled for too little? Do I really believe God wants to meet His people as they gather, or am I simply looking for a "fix" at church? Am I looking for that dopamine hit, the one that's readily available to me at a jazz club or a Timber's game? Because if I am, I've turned the good people who are creating services every week with sincerity and faithfulness into pushers. 

They're my drug dealers. I am their addict.

Perhaps that's why there's so much complaining that goes on in churches. The drug just doesn't have the same kick as it used to.


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